Recently, I was pressing in for a healing, an emotional healing. I was searching out healing for a very old wound. One that I had lived with for so long that I had forgotten the original cause. So what did God do? After a time of pressing and, yes, a fast, it was revealed when and how it started. I did what I thought was right and started asking Father to heal and bring me to forgivness. To my surprise instead He asked me, “If this incident happened today how would you feel and how would you react?”
Much to my suprise, I realized that my reaction would be different because the place I am now is so much more whole and healed and secure than then. When the original offense took place (14 years back), I did not know what to do or how to handle it so I just covered it (in an effort to cope) instead of healing. It became a deep infection in my soul and all things were filtered through that pain. I lived with a chronic spiritual and emotional pain for years thus putting me in a place of coping not healing.
I am happy to say that since the revealing and healing, I am now in a place where I could choose not to react. I am free to not be offended or hurt. I AM ABLE to see that no one can move me from my place. I choose what effects me and if or when I react. True healing brought peace. I could not have handled this 14 years ago but in God’s grace he allowed me to visit that offense with the strength of identity I have NOW. Don’t be afraid to ask the hard questions, God has us in his timing and in His timing He brings healing and closure.